Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Milestone charts: friend or foe?

When Benjamin was an infant, I loved milestone charts. There are three categories to most of these charts. The one on the left is labeled as what "almost all" kids can do; the one in the middle is what "most" kids can do; and the one on the right is what "some" kids can do. Needless to say, Benjamin was almost always on the far right hand side. Yes, we were a right-handed side milestone chart family! Oh, how my heart swelled with pride every time I looked at those milestone charts... Benjamin was going to be the next President of the United States. Or at least an astronaut. I was already envisioning the NASA Mom bumper sticker on my Honda.

At around 14 months or so, he slowly started slipping to the middle column for some of the sections. At 18 months, he was almost entirely off the chart in some sections since much of the abilities at that age are centered around language. Now, at almost 24 months, I haven't so much as glanced at a milestone chart in months simply because I could care less. Benjamin, like most children, is very advanced some areas, and very behind in others. I don't remember reading "ability to outmaneuver child safety locks" at 13 months anywhere on the chart.

Benjamin may not fit the mold, but he definitely surprises me everyday with his unusual abilities that far surpass what any milestone chart could ever tell me. The most amazing people in the world are a bit unusual, aren't they? How blessed am I to be the parent of this brilliant little boy? How are we going to pay for space camp???

I think that in the end, milestone charts are exactly what they say at the top of every single one of them and that most people tend to ignore- that they are only meant to be an estimate of the general aptitude of a broad range of children. I think that embracing the differences as well as the similarities in our children's abilities should be recognized.

So perhaps friend and foe.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Small miracles

Today was a great day.

Benjamin acted like a typical two year old today. (Almost two already, can't believe it.) He didn't cling to my side whining all day to be held. He napped almost two hours. He initiated play all by himself. He came to me with his needs. (drink, diaper) He was pleasant at the Dr's office. (We just had to fill out paperwork.)

He pitched a fit twice because he didn't want to come in and I just laughed because it delighted me so to see him happy with other children.

His favorite phrase this week is "weeeee". He says this going down the slide, on the swings, and when rolling his cars down the slide inside. He says it with actual purpose and not just endless babbling. It's amazing how a simple phrase of "weee" can really make your day. :)

Perspective makes all the difference in the world.

Small miracles.